Monday, August 31, 2009

Take My Hand

You told me life is like music. Unpredictable. I nodded half knowingly, listening to jazz on the player. I liked the way you moved, the swift dance you did, stepping into the tempo of music. Laughter.

The night was young with a fresh smell of rain washed streets. Ambiance, dimmed lights cast shadows on two glasses of wine. One almost empty, scarlet liquid stained the cream tablecloth. The seat where you left was still warm on leather.

I hugged myself, my lips on my knees. The flowing air kissed my bare shoulders.

You danced your way, immersed in music. I peered as you glided yourself across the room, cannot help but to smile.

You noticed my smile. I had to pretend to look away as you drew distance to me. I failed to hide my smile anyway. You blew in my ear and took a short bow. I looked up as you posed, arched back, one hand on your chest, another extended towards me.

"Take my hand." you smiled.

Monday, August 17, 2009

The Stay

I have been cracking my head trying to figure out what to write for the common assignment.With ten books on tort flipped opened in front of me and piles of photostated notes, the air conditioned room sounded so silent without a single soul present. The air of the city of KL is wet, windless after the massive downpour during the evenings. The night was bright with thousands of lights from the streets, vehicles and buildings, a view visible from the window of my college. It was 8pm. The sense of soiltude was significant as I sat in silence, trying my best to complete my work. The humming of the air conditioner eventually stopped in an abrupt end, as I began to sense the trickling of time passing as I paused between lines of words to ponder. Urgency seep in, I noticed. I frantically wrote only to listen to the rustling of papers and the scraping of my ball point pen upon parchment as my hand skiddled across my assignment. Page after page, I concentrated on my work, noticing my eyes were straining under tremendous load of concentration, as my contact lenses began to dry off and sting the corners of my eyes. It was 9pm, and finally, I completed my case study, with the utmost feeling of fleeting triumph. Quickly packing my stuff, I exited college to find myself walking on the rain-washed streets of China Town, on the way back to a place where I know I could anticipate a hot dinner and a cooling shower, a place where I called it my home.

Saturday, August 15, 2009

Sue Ann's Birthday

Notice anything weird?

LOL. All of us siaukias were dressed in BLUE, due to the celebration of our darling blue ant aka Sue Ann doraemon's birthday.

Since she loves blue so much (apart from Johnson, ahem), we deployed the theme colour and went to Pizza Hut Pavilion looking like a crazy bunch of Chelsea supporters.

Law people in blue with birthday girl in black.=)

Later in college, we had the cake cutting ceremony in an empty classroom and it was so noisy that we got some lecturer running over and telling us to shut up.

Johnson made her this cake.

So sweet~

The cake we bought for her which macam mana pun tak setanding Johnson yang made with love one.

Birthday girl getting all groomed up with all her pressies.

With the blue blue law dudes.

The biru biru girls.

Of course, last but not least...

With Johnson didi,konon....

LOL. Don't zzzst me okay? (insiders joke)
Well, and it comes to and end, wishing you,

Happy Birthday Darling =)

Thursday, August 13, 2009

The Educator me

There are these two kids who I gave private tuition to. They lived a block behind my house and they have been my students for almost half a year. Being kids, they both are super noisy, talkative and practical jokers. During classes, they somehow could manage to piss me off by making so much noise and fail me the duty to make them concentrate. I would nag and nag,and would shout my lungs out and sometimes I am even reduced to threaten them with not allowing them to go home but it can only make them shut up for about 30 seconds before the scene resumes to normal. Therefore, after every class, I would feel restless and relieved at the same time. Both these two kids, are a living nightmare in me, as I always dread classes with them. I would always have to act serious in order to discipline them, carry my frown and throwing fierce tones of disapproval to them. But somehow, they do not really get intimidated much. After a while they will be all smiles and talking and laughing.It really does put me in wonder how do they do this, and so finally it came to me that, they are still children. No burdens in life, carefree and idle. Their wold is so simple, and therefore they have such innocent minds, unable to fathom the world around them. They are not very brilliant students. Their aim in exams is just not to fail. So, in their life, there no longer exist any competition. They chose to just do their best in their area of responsibility, and live their life as a kid. Though I scold them a lot, I love all my students. Each of them are unique to my eyes. Sometimes,questions they asked which portray their hopes and ambitions makes me upset and sad.Like that day my Year 6 student suddenly told me about her ambition.

" Teacher, can I be a flight attendant when I grow up?"

I said why not?

Then she asked what she have to have in order for that.

" Do I have to be tall or something?"

Remembering the fact that physical appearances should not be set as the factor, I told her the substance which I feel crucial in order for her to achieve her dreams.

" Nope, but your English have to be good, considering you have to fly around."

Her face fell slightly. Her English wasn't anywhere near competent.

I was worried that I may put her down, but then her face lit up again, as she told me.

" Never mind teacher. If that's the sense I would work hard to improve my English."

And she continued to read her text happily.

It placed me into thinking that small children like her are able to have the mindset to think that they will make a difference in them for ambition. They can commit to improve, to learn, to build. I draw her statement to comparison and I felt that as her teacher, I cannot even have commitment like her, and though she is weak, she is willing to put in effort. I just feel that as her teacher, I would not want her just to get perfect marks, because in just a little bit of improvement, I would be very happy and proud of her. During her UPSR Trial, she passed all subjects but one, yet I praised her and encouraged her to put more effort. I am sincerely proud of my students, not by the end product straight As, but the process as they strive to merely pass. They don't have a solid foundation, but it is their willingness which earned them all stars.

And as usual, weak students have the common fear of whether they will get into remove classes rather than the normal Form 1 classes. This student just asked me that day, based on my judgement, would she get into remove classes.

Another little kid made some noise.

"Teacher, I am sure I'll get into remove."

I asked why."Because I am weak and stupid. I never pass my BM before."

I knew they were discouraged,so I gave them a personal encounter I had.

"You know I had a friend who went to remove last time. She is like you all, believing that she is stupid, because her UPSR sucks."

"But you know, hey what, she got number one during remove. She moved on to Form 1, so what if you take another year more to learn? In the end she got 9 As in SPM, and now she is in university.""I am here just to tell you that, no matter who you think you are now, it is not important at all. Provided that you are willing to work your way out, you can be just like my friend, able to get a place in university. It is not the results that matter, just what you do now, is it accountable for what I have taught you, the effort your teachers gave in school, your parent's hopes and money they send you for tuition. If you think that the effort you pay is equivalent to what you want, then what you ambit will be yours one day."

I think I encouraged them a lot. The next time I overheard them talking about the remove topic, they were influenced on the positive way.

" I don't want to read already la. Go remove then go remove la."

" No, remember what teacher said about her friend? That one who went to remove?"

Students like them doesn't serve as monthly income for me, merely. Teaching them knowledge is one thing. Educating them about perspective and decisions is another. Being their private tutor is a learning process, and through them, I had learnt how to be responsible towards my actions and words, being that what I have conveyed can serve as a lesson worth a lot to people, inadvertently or not. I know that in any way I do, I must be enitrely serving the purpose of instilling hope in lives of people, allowing them to lead life with purpose because they are able to work on the optimism that has been inflicted upon. I really do pray that my students could become successful individuals in the future, and I believe that they will. I will guide them all the way through, because I love them.

It's amazing how little children can make your perspective change. They truly are God-sent.

Tuesday, August 11, 2009


Hello to the me living in the age far from innocence.

I am still missing people from the past.
I'm not getting emo.

Sunday, August 9, 2009

Malaysian Students Leaders Summit 2009

Henry, Michelle and I attended MSLS (Malaysian Students Leaders Summit) for two days, which was organised by the UKEC (United Kingdom and Eire Council for Malaysia). It was held in Nikko Hotel KL, attended by students in universities. It was a very enlightening event, and without doubt, I am going to attend this again next year. Besides eye opening speeches, the exposure towards other students and potential leaders of tomorrow with their opinions was also very memorable. One of a kind experience, I daresay.

Dr Koh Tsu Koon giving a speech.

Science and tech thing.

Actually there were more photos during the first day of the event but I did not bring my camera, hence the lack of photos. Oh, we have got lots of national leaders in their respective fields giving us an insight about their perspective in the governance of the government and specific issues pertaining the growth of the nation. Okay, whatever people may say, I just believe that if we want to get things done, we have to take a stand and stop fluctuating between differences and stop generalising solutions for specific problems. Everyone was quite interested in the topic of One Malaysia, and whatever positive or responses that had been received, one thing has been justified. All of us wants change to move forward. Wants to be heard. And students are definitely not stupid nowadays.

Our beloved YB Khairy.

Yesterday Dr. M came who received a standing ovation from all of us upon his arrival. Influential man, he is. The opportunity to listen to his talk is once of a lifetime, due to his old age and all. No photos cause I forgot my camera. =(

Of course, not forgetting the smart looking law students. Michelle looked great in baju kurung. A sincere compliment. =)

Oh, by the way that guy there is Bryan. Henry's best friend. He is cool.

Four of us in the most important seats of the day. =)

For further info, check out

Friday, August 7, 2009

Hatin' On the Club

Envie KL

I'll limit alcohol consumption, seriously.

Thursday, August 6, 2009

Henry's 20th Birthday

We celebrated Henry's 20th birthday at Green Box Karaoke. I don't sing, yeah, sue me, my voice sucks. No harm joining for the sake of company though. College buddies are people who I love.

The birthday cake with 20 candles XD

Birthday boy has got his face smeared with icing.

The celebration parade. Theme was black or white. =) Henry insisted the theme. =X

We had lots of fun that day. The climax of the party was when they started pulling us to dance during Lady Gaga's songs towards the end of the session. Siau~ Last but not least,

Happy Birthday, Henry.

Tuesday, August 4, 2009

Bedtime Activity

I put the hard, wet shaft into my mouth. It penetrated deep into my cavity, as I roll my tongue around it, wrapping it in warm moisture. It moved in and out, drawing friction on my gums and teeth. I drew it faster, more erratic, as I feel liquid all in my mouth. Warm moisture, white, waved around in my mouth as the shaft drew in all directions. I bit it on the tip, as it exited while I spat out the debris of toothpaste and my saliva. Washing my toothbrush, I smiled as I saw the reflection of my sparkling white teeth.

Monday, August 3, 2009


Not the extremus type.

But the one in your eyes. I want belonging therefore I fluctuate between choices of freedom and emotions of hate and lust. I won't regret if I lose something I hold precious to.

Sunday, August 2, 2009


When I look at stars, I see someone else.

Saturday, August 1, 2009

The Amazing Race

On a fine Saturday morning I was at college for PTPTN loan interview and stuff where I was supposed to sleep at my bed. I missed by bed, and was kinda reluctant to get up. Without properly grooming ( I was in faded bermudas and slippers and I forgot to comb my hair) I set off to college, yawning my way in the train.

The loan thing was a tedious and super freaking time taking process. My documents were okay but unfortunately some of my friends' were not. They have all their certifications wrong or missed out certified copies and we have got only about one hour and a half before the officers leave. They have to get them settled or wait for the next batch, and of course, this means that they will have to wait for the money to pay for college fees. They panicked and started to curse bad language like never before. Please note that the loan application process is very time taking and troublesome. From online application to certification to bank accounts plus some of them are from outer space aka not KL people. So, screw it. We have to find a Commissioners of Oaths officer to certify them, or die on the streets.

Seven teenagers stranded on the streets in KL. We have no idea where is the nearest Commissioners of Oaths office.

Buying on the fact of our dear Ms. Shila who said that there is one at Central Market, we walked there and to find that we have to search for Mentari Court, which does not exist. In the end we got the directions from some bypassers which directed us to Pusat Tuisyen Kasturi, where we ascended the stairs, only to find out that it was actually on the ground floor, where we descended again, to find that it was closed. It was super terzadao-ed, and seven of us cursed in unison. No choice, we started another run to the place where we bought law books from, which is in Petaling Street, randomly and vaguely following directions according to Ee Von's memory because she remembered seeing a law firm there. We found the law firm, but it was closed, again. With emotions high and all the calls in and out, all the tears and harsh swearings, time was running out and everyone was tired, discouraged and worried. Jun Hon went missing during the run and nobody bothered about finding him back. Tuan Wern called Ms. Shila to ask for directions and got none. And it was Pek Kuan and Cai Lee who helped us online to check for law firms in college. Finally we got their tip to go for the office in Wisma Pahlawan, which is along Federal Highway, and we then set another foot run there. The best thing was, it was a busy street and nobody actually bothered using the pedestrian bridge to cross. And Ee Von demonstrated the best road crossing skills of the century. Finally, upon reaching Wisma Pahlawan, I accompanied Yu Chieh back to college to take Jane's document, while the rest went up to sign their stuffs. And the best thing was, the lawyer in Wisma Pahlawan did not just refused to sign their documents, he gave them a lashing of their lives and that's it. After the amazing race and all the nonsense, finally amounted to nothing at all. Seven of us returned to college, sweating and tired.

One thing I have seen from this amazing race of ours is that, hey, we have really show some true friendship here. Nobody complained while offering help and it's sincere when even just helping friends when they are desperate. Supporting them and knowing that in times like this, all they need is just understanding. Though tired and thirsty and running like a moron in my faded clothes and slippers in town, heh, it doesn't matter at all. It really doesn't matter at all.