Saturday, May 26, 2007

Happy Teachers' Day

The first and last time celebrating Teachers’ Day in SMKRA, with a bunch of teachers who I do not even know they existed. Early that morning, we were to assemble in the hall. The attendance was poor and pathetic. Even the number of prefects looks more than the whole school’s students added together. Today, every teacher was dressed in green, looking like a large patch of grass.

The event started by singing the national anthem and a few patriotic songs. The last one was the school song, which was damn funny. I was laughing non-stop. It was just that those teachers behind me started to point, then I shut up. But my ribs were aching from the control of not bursting out laughing. Not only me encountered the situation, a lot of my friends had the same feeling. The school song was agreeable weird and funny. It was: “Majulah majulah, SMK Raja Abdullah……”

There were 2 Malay girls as MCs for the event. The tonality made my hairs stand. It was that type of flirting slang. Then, to nobody’s surprise, there was a series of speeches, by the Agong and the Minister of Education. Nobody paid much attention to those speeches. Even the teachers were chattering behind. Me, the twins and Zi Qin started a game of hangman but was forbidden by a teacher. Then the teachers had to sing a song. A malay teacher just went up there and yelled the whole song through the microphone, the others just stood and murmured. Then as for the cake cutting ceremony, the teachers were presented a cake, which looked like a slab of dough. Then we only realized that it was glutinous rice.

Then the teachers had to go to the field to play some games, and we students were supposed to go there and watch, which only we did. The other students of the school disappeared. Therefore we just talked and when the time reached 10.30am, we went for recess.

After recess, there was a string of performances. First, a girl dressed like a jellyfish read a poem and sang. It sounds like wailing. Then the typical Indian dance. Then 3 guys presented a unplugged guitar accompaniment. Boring. Then there was a presentation to appreciate each teacher in the school.

Then it was the end. Stupid day.

Saturday, May 19, 2007

School of ROCK (restless, obnoxious, childish kids)

Form 6 2007 started abruptly, as all of us were still in the supreme holiday mood. Everybody hated the fact that we were all submitted to SMKRA, which had a strong, historical bad reputation in notorious students, ineffective teachers and low quality education, basic facility and discipline.

Under the protective shield of Shin Peih’s car, gazing at the area around the school compound after school hours, the situation I found was not entirely pleasing. Guys wearing school uniforms walked the streets in single file, as though their family booked the road. Some of those guys did dangerously childish actions, like pushing around in packs, narrowly avoiding the busy traffic. Some naïve ones even threw their school bags on the center of the road, causing cars to maneuver sharply on the spot, propped by their ringing laughter. Girls dyed their hair, name a colour, I will find you the correct shade. Those with long hair did not even bothered to tie up their hair, allowing the great bunch of untidy, fashionable hair whip the wind. Wearing their pinafore above knee level, those girls were clearly inviting for trouble, as I saw two guys dressing casually on a motorbike drove up to two of those giggling girls and began to flirt. Doing some rough calculations in my troubled mind, out of 10 guys, 7 of them wore re-designed long pants, sporting boot cut, the Elvis Presley style. Somehow, they were not matured and quite silly.

Here are a list of teachers I have met.
Chandra- Penyelaras Form 6. A guy with a great deal of bushy, dirty looking moustache. He was annoyingly ugly looking, when he speaks, he showed the facial expression that suggested that he is the authority. And for God’s sake, hear him talk. He will make a great deal of money by doing hypnosis. In each speech, he will make sure that he repeated each point for 3 times. In the welcoming speech, he was given 30 minutes. In 10, he finished everything. Panicking but steady, he began to repeat, using a wide selection of voices and tonality. Passive and active voice, then direct and indirect speech. Everyone was bored to an unbelievable extend, but tried to respect him. Other schools were listening attentively but clearly not receiving the message, but us St. Marians were criticizing, commenting and laughing without keeping our voices down.
Counselor- She had a face that suggested she went through a war and survived. Battered and weary. She had a special way to start her speech, which is by blurting out every name of the counselor teachers she knew of each respective school, expecting us to be impressed, which we did not. Instead we gave her a “who cares” expression that made her shut up. During her second speech, we bombarded her with questions until she surrendered, and ever since she did not gave a single speech longer than 2 minutes.
Discipline teacher- A fat guy with a completely snow white hair, and a face that seems suspiciously been treated with a lot of botox. He was seen carrying a cane like a blind man and biting a whistle on his teeth when I first saw him, ordering students like training dogs. He gave a speech about discipline, which was very contradicting with the poor standard of discipline in the school. He keep emphasizing the word “punish” which all of us find it funny rather than threatening. He also kept making the impression that he was dangerous and strict. Overall, I still think he did not make a difference in his presence in the school.
PK HEM- A lady looking old and easily bullied. She made a short speech, which was good for us.
PK Koko- She gave us correct facts, which I respected her for that particular reason.
PK HEM 1- A ordinary looking guy. He said the reason for us to transfer was not logic and unacceptable. The twins hated him a lot. Somehow I think that he was quite stupid. It doesn’t take a genius to determine how logic is for a student who lived in Sentul to go to a school in Sentul by feet instead of Jalan Kepong, which are kilometers away. Weird huh?
PA teacher- He had a P. Ramlee movie star look, and a classic, Bahasa Melayu baku slang in his speech. He asked me a question because I was talking during his briefing, which earned my confused and surprised nod.
MUET teacher- a lady who sucks in English. She said: “You is…..” Zi Qin was cursing her in every minute of her speech.
Chemistry teacher- A big lady who was more eligible in teaching English, rather than chemistry. I think her name is Miss Mary. She told us about Thomas Alva Edison and his quotation. Zi Qin said her style of speaking was very similar to mine. A good thing about her was she knew that SMKRA students sucks in English, orally and written.
Biology teacher- The twins said that she looks young and foolish, and doubted the capability of her in conducting lessons. I still think that she is just okay, the kind of pro students and understanding teacher.
Physics teacher-Mr. Kwong, Sze Yiing’s dad. He spoke like a politician, being neutral all the time. He is also motivating and practical, and the type of people who strongly believed in numbers and figures.
Other A-Maus- A guy who wore PE attire every single day I saw him. A teacher wearing purple with a pathetic height of half a door. And still wondering whether they had a principal, or the rumor that said that the principal had been off the post for the past 2 years is true.

Let’s put in a comparative way, between SMKRA and St. Mary.
Mornings in St. Mary’s
At 7 sharp we were allowed to enter the classrooms, where students practice a habit of self revising or reading, though minority will talk and sleep. At 7.15 will be a short assembly, about 10 minutes. We will spend the first 5 minutes reading, which is compulsory, in total silence. Then it will be the announcements, sometimes there will be interesting activities like public speaking, promoting books and so on. Then we will go into the classrooms, lined up, in total silence.
Mornings in SMKRA
No matter how early you arrive, students stand around the parking area, all talking, wasting time. There is no reading habit practiced. Then the bell will ring, signaling the time to assemble. Students will group to the assembly base, still talking. After everyone shut up, the assembly will start by a teacher scolding about the noise. Then everyone will sing the national anthem, rather murmuring than singing. The announcement will come then everyone will dismiss, and the noise will start all over again.
Recess in St. Mary’s
We eat in hygienic conditions, nice tables, clean and orderly arranged. We put our plates into tubs, dividing between plates and glasses.
Recess in SMKRA
Salute those students. They must have strong intestines. I lost my appetite the first time I arrived at the canteen. It looks like a stall by the road. The tables were oily and a mixture of soup+water+curry+bones were spilt on them. Those students just leave their food debris and plates on the tables after they have eaten. Low moral, right?
Breaks in St. Mary’s
We do go to the toilets, but we always wear a pass.
Breaks in SMKRA
They loiter in groups.
After school hours in St. Mary’s
We tend to go a little wild by talking loudly, but still stayed on track, not breaking serious school rules.
After school hours in SMKRA
They exited and started pressing their mobile phones. Swearing and vulgar words were heard. A minority took out cigarettes and began to smoke.
Notice the distinctive difference?

It sucks from every brick to cement. The walls were full of graffiti and in special cases, motor oil. The stairs had some kind of slimy, rusty, red liquid flowing down, which gave me goosebumps. The banisters were rusty and metal slides were sticking out in odd angles. The cement floor had holes. There was one switch in the 6th Form block that was smashed and cracked, suggesting horribly that someone had landed his fist on the innocent piece of plastic. There are only 2 toilet cubicles, for the whole population of the school. One of the cubicles cannot be locked. It was the first time I had encountered such a problem while doing my business. I had to control the flow of my urine, at the same time I had to make sure that the door was securely shielding me. They did not even provide proper sanitary disposal bins. The bin was just an ordinary classroom dustbin, without a plastic bag. The basins did not have pipes attached on it, after washing hands, surely my shoes will be soaked. It was actually funny when we found out that there were toilet bowls for gents in the ladies toilet. Practicing unisex standard in school? And I still cannot comprehend the point of placing two pieces of brick in front of the school gate. Plus, most of the fans in the hall were out of order, or made noises like farting when switched on. The ventilation of the hall sucks. The PA system was not good either.

A shower of hands showed more than 90% of the newcomers had lodged for a transfer. The orientation period consisted of mostly brainwashing speeches, to convince us not to transfer, especially potential excellent students. The school invited a bunch of ex students to convince us. The first guy is a guy who studied in Singapore, who sucked in English. Another guy kept pissing us off by addressing us like: “Who do you think you are? You are just a student.” Damn cocky and irritating. Then it was some girls. A particular one spent the most time, putting me into a deep sleep. Another spoke total Malay Language, which I automatically classified her as low standard. Another one changed language halfway, but at least tried. Teachers tried to brainwash us too. They kept telling us that this school is good in co-curricular activities, which is not important compared to academic.

Appreciation. I love St. Mary’s. If I would have the chance to go to Maxwell, I will thank God on bended knees. I will serve Maxwell like a noble servant, a humble slave. I will respect the school and love it forever and ever. Bless me.

Monday, May 14, 2007


"Mothers' Day fell on May 13th, remember 513, yeah, the day Malaysians remembered most in the history of Malaysia. 513, the day the dominant race of the year of 1969 in Malaysia decided to launch a massacre, to eliminate the economically prevailing race. Then the government formed a organisation to create 5 crucial memos (Rukun Negara), where each and every Malaysian have to follow to establish a patriotic and peaceful lifestyle in Malaysia. (which I don't really think so). Chanted this 5 sucking memos every Monday assembly in school, even memorised it sub-consciously. That's all about 513 and Rukun Negara.

Last Wednesday I decided to buy something for mum when I went Metro Prima to treat the twins Secret Recipe (a part of the SPM Deal). So we went to Watson's Concept Store to check out some girlish and pamperish stuff. So we went to the body care department, which is full of self spa body wash, body lotion, talcum powder and all girls stuff, typical girls' stuff. So I asked for the twins opinion and they suggested something expensive looking and large but cheap. So I found the green tea range of stuff by Follow Me and took a bottle of green tea body scrub. The label said the contents are green tea essence and leaves and all kinds of natural ingredients, which all I doubted. But it was expensive looking so I bought it. RM 18 per bottle. The twins took one for their mum too, which I think they just wanted to convince her to accept the idea of their new school uniform( their mum wanted to save money so she suggested to cut off the upper part of the pinafore and transform it to a form 6 skirt. Weird huh.) rather than appreciating their mother.

Today had trouble to present the present to my mum. My sister was out of the plan because she said she don't want to contribute a single cent for the present. My brother did not even realise that it was mothers' day until the afternoon, so I just chucked th present on her work table while she was busy on the phone. I don't even think she had opened it too. I wrapped the present in a piece of envelope and stapled it on the opening. Looks like a pile of rubbish.

Then it came to the part of the dinner. Previously we used to go out for dinner in some restaurant in the suburbs but this year some argument happened concerning
my grandma, my aunts and my mum. We ended up breaking the tradition. Just bought a cheap cake with only one candle( my cousin forgot to ask for more), 2 bottles of coke from 7-11, and an almost rotten papaya from my aunt's house. The celebration ended up with me pissing off because they complained about my papaya cutting technique, which resulted the papaya looking like ice cream rather in slices. It turned out worse when they we realised that we ran out off ice cubes. The environment was uncomfortable with everyone packed into my terribly small dining room and with me and my mum looking daggers at each other.

Today is truly a annoyingly day to remember Mothers' Day celebration. It is true that we saved a lot of money and the trouble in finding the location of the restaurant, compared to the previous years, but it was chaotic. Now I still face a major problem, what to buy for my mum's birthday, which is in October. Somehow I lacked creativity in buying presents for old people, especially fussy and annoying big-mouthed women. Come on! Contribute me some ideas!!