Saturday, April 24, 2010

To Mum

Yeah it's true that everything in the world is not just evolving around studies, and it's true to have life amidst the hiatus, exercise better time management and be smart instead of just working hard. But I can't because apparently I'm too stupid.

The pendulum swings in favour of perspective.
Yeah, I'm a nerd with no life.

Fuck me.

Saturday, April 17, 2010

Oh! The Places you’ll Go!
By Dr. Seuss

Today is your day.
You’re off to Great Places!
You’re off and away!

You have brains in your head.
You have feet in your shoes.
You can steer yourself any direction you choose.

You’re on your own. And you know what you know. And YOU are the guy who’ll decide where to go.
You’ll look up and down streets. Look’em over with care. About some you will say, “I don’t choose to go there.” With your head full of brains and your shoes full of feet, you’re too smart to go down a not-so-good street.

And you may not find any you’ll want to go down. In that case, of course, you’ll head straight out of town. It’s opener there in the wide open air.

Out there things can happen and frequently do to people as brainy and footsy as you.
And when things start to happen, don’t worry. Don’t stew. Just go right along. You’ll start happening too.

Oh! The Places You’ll Go!
You’ll be on your way up!
You’ll be seeing great sights!
You’ll join the high fliers who soar to high heights.

You won’t lag behind, because you’ll have the speed. You’ll pass the whole gang and you’ll soon take the lead. Wherever you fly, you’ll be best of the best. Wherever you go, you will top all the rest.

Except when you don’t.
Because, sometimes, you won’t.

I’m sorry to say so but, sadly, it’s true that Bang-ups and Hang-ups can happen to you.
You can get all hung up in a prickle-ly perch. And your gang will fly on. You’ll be left in a Lurch.
You’ll come down from the Lurch with an unpleasant bump. And the chances are, then, that you’ll be in a Slump.

And when you’re in a Slump, you’re not in for much fun. Un-slumping yourself is not easily done.
You will come to a place where the streets are not marked. Some windows are lighted. But mostly they’re darked. A place you could sprain both your elbow and chin! Do you dare to stay out? Do you dare to go in? How much can you lose? How much can you win?

And if you go in, should you turn left or right…or right-and-three-quarters? Or, maybe, not quite? Or go around back and sneak in from behind? Simple it’s not, I’m afraid you will find, for a mind-maker-upper to make up his mind.

You can get so confused that you’ll start in to race down long wiggled roads at a break-necking pace and grind on for miles across weirdish wild space, headed, I fear, toward a most useless place.

The Waiting Place…for people just waiting.
Waiting for a train to go or a bus to come, or a plane to go or the mail to come, or the rain to go or the phone to ring, or the snow to snow or waiting around for a Yes or No or waiting for their hair to grow. Everyone is just waiting.

Waiting for the fish to bite or waiting for wind to fly a kite or waiting around for Friday night or waiting, perhaps, for their Uncle Jake or a pot to boil, or a Better Break or a string of pearls, or a pair of pants or a wig with curls, or Another Chance. Everyone is just waiting.

No! That’s not for you!

Somehow you’ll escape all that waiting and staying. You’ll find the bright places where Boom Bands are playing. With banner flip-flapping, once more you’ll ride high! Ready for anything under the sky. Ready because you’re that kind of a guy!

Oh, the places you’ll go! There is fun to be done! There are points to be scored. There are games to be won. And the magical things you can do with that ball will make you the winning-est winner of all. Fame! You’ll be famous as famous can be, with the whole wide world watching you win on TV.

Except when they don’t. Because, sometimes, they won’t.

I’m afraid that sometimes you’ll play lonely games too. Games you can’t win ‘cause you’ll play against you.
All Alone!

Whether you like it or not, Alone will be something you’ll be quite a lot.
And when you’re alone, there’s a very good chance you’ll meet things that scare you right out of your pants. There are some, down the road between hither and yon, that can scare you so much you won’t want to go on.
But on you will go though the weather be foul. On you will go though your enemies prowl. On you will go though the Hakken-Kraks howl. Onward up many a frightening creek, though your arms may get sore and your sneakers may leak. On and on you will hike. And I know you’ll hike far and face up to your problems whatever they are.

You’ll get mixed up, of course, as you already know. You’ll get mixed up with many strange birds as you go. So be sure when you step. Step with care and great tact and remember that Life’s a Great Balancing Act. Just never forget to be dexterous and deft. And never mix up your right foot with your left.

And will you succeed?
Yes! You will, indeed!
(98 and ¾ percent guaranteed.)
Kid, you’ll move mountains!
So…be your name Buxbaum or Bixby or Bray or Mordecai Ale Van Allen O’Shea, you’re off to Great Places!
Today is your day!
Your mountain is waiting.
So…get on your way!

*Dedicated to Yoong Sin and Yong Ling: You are the ones who told me who I can be more than I am. And I appreciate that.

Friday, April 16, 2010


No regrets of going to this place for law. I have deleted so many entries again and again. In short, I love you: Von, Sue Ann, JJ, Soo Wen, Daniel, Bird, Henry and everyone else who I feel your sincerity. Listening, is great help. At least for my case.

The thing that I've always dreaded happened again. I'm so close in letting myself giving in for little things until I halted myself and STOP!!!! Look at were are you stepping to Hui Ting! Don't ever be sidetracked by insignificant stuff! It's quite a cliche to feel gloomy these days. Happens every other day. If it's not for exam stress it would be nonsensical jealousy, or the dilemma of familial responsibilities, or even PMS, or bitches. I lack energy, I think. I just want to go to bed because I feel tired after crying.

But the Hui Ting I knew is tough, brave and determined. So, if life give me CHALLENGES, so CHALLENGES will make me tougher, make me a fighter, strengthen my willpower, make me a better warrior in the course of life.

"When you feel like giving up, remember why you held on for so long in the first place."

To (whatever challenges including arseholes who have the potential to ruin my willpower) YOU, I'll never GIVE UP, not even in your fucking face of ignorance, not even in adversity, not even in a million years! You dream on and fuck out of my life. I need to be in constant positive energy of motivation, in the atmosphere of belief and encouragement. Not of the attitude of non-appreciation.

I quote Dr Seuss:

And will you succeed?
Yes! You will, indeed!
(98 and ¾ percent guaranteed.)
Kid, you’ll move mountains!

Wednesday, April 14, 2010

But For

If she holds biasness, treating me with unfairness,
If she burdens me with responsibilities;
If she keeps reminding me how imperfect I am,
If she points out every mistake I make,
If she fails to acknowledge every achievement I make;
If she expects more than I can offer,
If she demands for the impossible,
If she makes me lose hope by telling me I'm less than I am,
If she reminds me of her disappointments in me,
If she demands for respect, even in odds,
If she impedes my freedom of expressing my opinions,
If she demands absolutely;
If she compares and makes unreasonable preferences;

But if she does everything so,
I cannot demand for more,
Because she gave me everything I am today, and I am thankful.
Because she is human, she have flaws I choose to understand.
Because she is my mother, so I chose to tolerate.

PS: I'm typing this while listening to my mum nag. LOL. How oxymoron this can be lol?