Envelope

It was so close, that she could see the particles of dust upon the glass window panes. Outside, the street lights glowed orange. She felt the darkness creeping nearer by distance; the darkness of solitude she was so familiar with. The silence which works, walking in tandem added insult to injury. People were from far, she closed her eyes trying to recognise the voice she knew by heart in the midst of whispers. But nowhere could assurance be found. Nothing came.

She knew how agony cures another; it is all feelings in the end. Since the start. Allow the flesh receive similar as the heart could bear, she would want to do, and with vengeance so sweet. Stealing is a crime, that when your heart could no longer throb in your body because it has been stolen.

It was the sound she had been yearning to hear, regardless the words. Substance has been long disregarded, the aftermath had took place by default. Everyone should know, but she knew better. She was enveloped with immense pleasure when she saw the blade penetrated the mass of soft meat, the splatter of blood which rained on her face, crimson. It was a toast of a celebration. Like how everything works, it is the death of one, with the birth of another. The person she knew well died that day when the heart was stolen away; the birth of another is one creature without a heart.

She has got the courtesy to change the sheets and clean the floor. As water washes away the blood, she realises she has a larger burden to dispose of now.

Emo

Balance

I have deleted so many entries yet the frustration still lingers. As much as I want to express myself freely in my own damn blog, I also know the certain level of privacy that I must have in order to protect myself. So it's a choice between venting out the temporary anger I harbour or to shut up and make everybody's lives easier.

ARGHHHHHHHH!!!!!

In short, I feel so lonely here.

Sex Appeal

Maroon Five has got it all. Everything to make music worth listening. I love them, and I love the music more. Most importantly, I love it when the music makes me high.


For one hell of an orgasmic music ride, try Give A Little More. Thanks Darryl. =)

Accident!

Saturday morning was as usual, the usual kid I teach, and coming back home for brunch before sending bro to tuition. After dropping him, I was at diverging thoughts of whether to take the usual way-using Jln Kuching to college, or to use another alternative, which is to take LDP. My instincts told me to follow the unsolicited, usual route; and clearly, the jam on the opposite direction shows the positive. However, the adamant side of my head told me to make a U-turn and hence I found myself driving along LDP, using another way to college. I felt the ping of guilt deep down, but I ignored, focusing my mind on getting to my destination.

Shortly after I realised the practical reality posed itself evident. I was unfamiliar with the route and I was constantly referring to my phone for directions. On several occassionas, I was not focusing much on the road and I swerved quite some times to sharply take bypassed junctions. Deep down, I know something is not right. And it was when I was stuck in a bumper to bumper move along Sprint flyover in front of Tropicana City Mall, I realised that I was moving too fast into the stationary car in front of me, and when I slammed on the brakes, I cannot manage myself to stop in time. I banged the front car, which as a result of the impact, banged the car in front as well.

I was of course, overwhelmed by extreme shock and being unable to control my fear, I cried. When my aunt and friends came to help, I cried again. Upon listening to the price quotation for the damaged caused, which was jibainiama 5K, I cried again. I think the people whom their cars were banged by me was pretty scared by me crying non stop so they did not really talk to me, but insurance covered up the cost pretty much. My car is okay and working, unlike the two which I hit. Besides kena-ing saman, I pretty do not have much to settle. Of course, the domestic violence of getting shot left right centre front back by mum was inevitable. And I'm banned from driving. The accident gave me a one hell of a lifetime lesson to learn, but also gave me the experience of the first time engaging in an accident and handling all the consequences myself.

I thank God that I'm fine and the car is working, still. I also thank God for aunt who came and helped me settle the issues, Dan and Erna who accompanied me to report and talked me through. All friends who called to care. I'm truly blessed. Thanks a lot people, loves. No regrets for that one whole day.