Masks, Traps, Laughter and Assumptions

Surprise! I am going to write my post in a 3rd point of view form, because I want to voice out something in an indirect way. No one gets hurt, ok?

Cursing under her breath, Hui Ting was fanning herself furiously with a transparent plastic file, complaining silently about the weather. 3 rickety fans hung from the classroom ceiling, on maximum speed, yet did no much change to the increasing temperature. The afternoon sun was blazing outside, sending rays of sunlight through the glass panels of the classroom, where it hosts 32 students, all teenagers and full of energy. The scenario was chaotic and noisy. Her classmates were shouting from a corner to another, laughing loudly, talking vigorously, and apparently having fun. Hui Ting cannot think of anything else. The stiffening room and the humid air were making her sub-conscious, and she began to feel a slight pain on her left temple, throbbing against her sweaty forehead. Turning her focus onto the pile of Chemistry notes stacked in front of her, she pressed her fingers on her head harder and tried to concentrate. Immediately her eyes began to water. Slamming her fists on the table, she cursed again, this time louder than before. Hui Ting knew that she had a hard day in school, yet she knew that she had to just be patient and wait for the bell to ring after 1 and a half hour more for the signal to dismiss. This morning, she got very angry because some guy from her class had underestimated her command of English language. Then she got frustrated about the debate which is just around the corner, because it involved working in a team with the guy that underestimated her. The debate was not even a fair one. The opposing team had a member which knew about the facts by his fingertips because he did the exact same thing last year. And the title was actually chosen by 1 of the judges who was the English instructor of the opposing team member. Hui Ting knew that she was no speaker, let alone debater, yet she volunteered to be a part of it to gain experience, not to get humiliated. But somehow her first experience was not an inviting one, and as a result, she felt greatly disappointed.

Hui Ting awoke from her daydream when the Chemistry teacher entered class. While copying notes, she looked around her classmates. They were so unfamiliar to her. She began to miss her friends terribly. Her mind drifted to those times when they were still studying in 5sc4, in St. Mary’s. Everyone in her class was so close knitted, so cooperative and the friendship bond was so significant. Hui Ting still can recall the scene in class. The twins sat in front, always the most attentive ones in class. Behind her, Zi Qin will always be the one who walks around, sticking her head in everybody’s business. And beside Zi Qin is Suet Lye, so quiet yet so funny, and ah yes, she was a DBSK loyal fan. Then it will be Mei Li sitting behind, always under the fan, talking loudly and laughing, flanked by Chu Shyen, assistant monitor, and also Hwee Fern. There will also be Jhen Pei in the group, also another joker, with Amirah by her side, making up the world’s best friends. She knew those days were gone forever, and will not come back ever again. The worst part of her life is to part with her best friends. She missed their support, their encouragement. On top all, she missed their presence in life. The twins, her best friends, were in the next class. But being in different classes divide the gap even more. They chose different paths in life. They got different subjects. They have different schedules. Therefore, they broke apart eventually. Sometimes, Hui Ting got really pissed by the whole situation, but she cannot complaint. Because these are the terrible truths of life. Parting is human nature. Besides, this is nobody’s fault. Being angry is not the solution to get back the attention she lost from her best friends. She finally learnt to be patient and polite, and to support her best friends behind their backs, just like they did to her. Silently.

Hui Ting gazed around her class. Her classmates were sitting in their own groups. She wanted to be friendly and mix around, but she got wind from Michelle that some of them were talking bad about her. Hui Ting knew that she had to be brave, but her confidence crippled. She became very self conscious and suspicious. She began to hate everyone around her, giving the reason that they were being political when it comes to position. She knew perfectly well that some of them were not like that, but she chose to have the awareness, so that she would not be the victim of the politic propaganda. She knew that when it comes to power seizing, everyone will show their real attitude behind their masked appearance. Hui Ting chose to be practical, and she chose to battle with them, to hurt and to get hurt. People said that Form 6 is where you get a chance to mature, very different to college. Hui Ting found it quite true. In form 6 is where she learnt time management and all other intrapersonal skills, and also survival skills for her in use during life in society after graduation.

At last, the bell rang. Hui Ting picked all her belongings and headed towards the door. She did not turn back to wave to her friends, or say goodbye. When she left class, nobody sensed a fellow classmate’s absence. When Hui Ting walked alone on the busy streets of KL, she knew that those who survived, will bear the most scars. Gasping slightly, she felt an invisible dagger slashed her heart, producing a bleeding wound, that will evolve to form a scar. She opened her eyes, and breathed again.